Story Book

The fun, the funny, the wacky, and the sublime. Off-topic, humor, whatever. Post it here!
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bobcat
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Re: Story Book

Post by bobcat »

Rick Pope wrote:
Thu Feb 15, 2024 8:25 am
Now I have coffee in my keyboard.

Bob, I'm with you on 1 and 3, but I'm not clear on 2. Maybe I need more coffee.

If/when the unthinkable happens, you have something to clean up with. :(

I was riding my CL350 from Dallas to El Paso fighting about a 30mph headwind so I tucked in
behind an 18 whlr. hauling cattle. Just about the instant I had the thought "what if a cow pie
drops out of the trailer"....SPLAT...covered head to toe, open face helmet but I happened to
have a towel with me that got put to use as quickly as I could pull over. I had on sunglasses
and fortunately wasn't smiling. 8)
Bob
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Re: Story Book

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bobcat wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2024 3:06 am
Rick Pope wrote:
Thu Feb 15, 2024 8:25 am
Now I have coffee in my keyboard.

Bob, I'm with you on 1 and 3, but I'm not clear on 2. Maybe I need more coffee.

If/when the unthinkable happens, you have something to clean up with. :(

I was riding my CL350 from Dallas to El Paso fighting about a 30mph headwind so I tucked in
behind an 18 whlr. hauling cattle. Just about the instant I had the thought "what if a cow pie
drops out of the trailer"....SPLAT...covered head to toe, open face helmet but I happened to
have a towel with me that got put to use as quickly as I could pull over. I had on sunglasses
and fortunately wasn't smiling. 8)


Larry, oh don't we learn from our mistakes!
Bob
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Re: Story Book

Post by Syscrush »

Great thread, Bob. Do you take requests? :lol:
Phil in Toronto
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Re: Story Book

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Syscrush wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2024 11:18 am
Great thread, Bob. Do you take requests? :lol:

Sure, what do you have in mind ? I'm waiting for some of you to to post your stories too !
By all means jump in. :D
Bob
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Re: Story Book

Post by Syscrush »

I loved your story about riding the race bike home from CA to TX, and I'm sure that others here would really love it, too.

I'll come up with a couple of my own I can share. Thanks for making this thread!
Phil in Toronto
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Re: Story Book

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OK Phil, Let's see what I can come up with.


"Racing home (?)" from Laguna Seca, Ca., summer of 1983

A group of friends, I and the guy I had built the bikes for , Matt, headed west (a long ways) to attend Matt's
first AMA pro race on his 750 Interceptor. I had previously built a 1980 CB750F for Matt that he went 13 straight
races undefeated in 750 Superbike including the WERA Natl. no.1 title at Road Atlanta. After buying the Interceptor
the F was retired to the street but we took it and all the hardware necessary to put it back race ready as a backup
to the VF750F. I was using it as transportation back and forth to our hotel in Carmel. The Superbike race was on
Saturday and Matt had fought his way up to 1st privateer (behind all factory team bikes when he suddenly lost it
at the bottom of the "Corkscrew" and went flying into a stack of haybales about 50 yards off the track.

The crash almost totaled the bike but Matt got his bell rung pretty badly. Still, he wanted me to get the CB750F
converted back to race form for the F1 race on Sunday. Fortunately we all convinced him that he was in no condition
to be racing and to sit this one out and just relax and watch the race.

It had been a long boring trip from Dallas to central California in either the van or packed in a Ford Bronco and I didn't
want to ride back in either so I asked Matt "hey, let me ride the bike back". He said "you'll never make it back on that
thing" ! Sure I will" confidently. "Don't forget who built it"! Problem is I don't have enough money so he reluctantly
agreed and handed me $80 and a Phillips 66 credit card and Monday morning I rolled out of Carmel and headed solo
into the unknown.

I wanted to take HWY 1 south along the coast but it was closed for construction so I had to take 101, the hot inland
route to San Louis Obispo where I headed east to Bakersfield and then across the hot as hell Mojave desert to the small
town of Needles at the border with Arizona. I had a great time crossing the mountain range from S.L.O. to Bakersfield.
The east slopes were barren grassland and you could see the twisty curves sometimes 3 turns ahead and I got a good chance
to let it rip, one of the few times I'd had a chance to do so on that bike. But the desert erased all that fun and entering AZ.
it got worse. The road dropped off a plateau and it got unbearably hot. I stopped at a convenience store and bought a
couple of "tall boys" and sat down on the curb and got my map out. The temp. was 113f so I got out my windbreaker to
keep from getting windburn and checked the bike over and back on the road. I had to slow pace out of fear of overheating
the motor which had run flawless all day cruising 70-90mph.

It was late afternoon and I figured I would try to reach Kingman AZ. by dark and call it a day. I had covered a lot of territory
and I was starting to feel it but the wide variety of scenery kept me from thinking about it.
It was the long straight stretch of hwy coming into Kingman that I ran into a little trouble with the HWY. Patrol. Pulling over
I got out all the necessary documentation to present to the officers, a man and woman who were very polite but the first
question "do you know how fast you were going"? I explained why the bike didn't have a speedo, where I was coming from,
where I was headed and sheepishly said "70-75 ? " How about 95" the Cop said. I had no answer so I just shrugged. "Well,we're
going to have to write you a citation" and I braced myself but as I went to sign it I had to fight off a smile as I looked at the
charge "Failure to Conserve Energy" !

I asked where there was a motel in Kingman and they told me what exit to take with motels and restaurants and wished me
well and said slow down.
A good nights rest and breakfast recharged me so I did a little preventive bike work, mainly tensioned the cam chains, tire press.
etc. and looked at the map again and then looked at the cash situation. I hadn't seen a Phillips 66 station yet and I figured
there would be one more motel stay and it was looking pretty grim cash wise but away I went crossing AZ. and half of New Mexico
and finally, a Phillips 66 !

The trucks on I-40 had beat the road up badly wearing grooves the made changing lanes like crossing a boat wake. The stiff race
suspension was beating me to death but I still managed to clip along with the abundant trucks at about 80-85mph. On long empty
stretches I kept looking at the tach needle that kept creeping up. I would back off the throttle but it would creep right back up
to about 7500rpm, sometimes 8000. That's just where it wanted to run with no effort at all. I had thought about toughing it out
and trying to make it all the way home that night but I was beat and didn't want to ride that far in the dark so I stopped in Amarillo
TX. I didn't have enough money left for a motel room and food and of course some beer so I went to a La Quinta, called my wife
and asked her to go to the nearest La Quinta and pay for a room in Amarillo. Next morning I hit the road again and rolled up to the
house about 3:00 in the afternoon Where I grabbed the wife first, then a cold beer and sat down to begin absorbing what I had just
been through. In the segment between Kingman,AZ and Amarillo, TX. I nearly made the 1000 mile club in one day.

The bike ran flawlessly the whole trip. As promised I did a complete tune up on it and the only thing. I found it needed was 3 valve
shims that were just barely out of adj. It had used about 1/4 qt. of oil and the plugs looked almost new. I hated to give it back to
Matt.
We totally rebuilt the Interceptor but this time we went all out on it, Carillo rods, Arias pistons, Megacycle cams, oversize stainless
valves and I had already done the port work. Matt went on to earn the WERA Natl. No.2 title with it 1984 losing to a Canadian rider
on an RGV500 four two stroke. I thought that should have been ruled an F1 only but it was allowed in 750SB. there was no one behind
Matt for quite some distance.

It took me nearly 3 days to get back from Cal. but it took about 2 weeks to recover from it. Leisurely ride you say ? Try it on a race
bike. I'm sure there's still a warrant for me in AZ. I never paid the $25 citation. :D :lol:
Bob
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Re: Story Book

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That's an amazing story, Bob. Thanks for sharing it.

It's not on the same scale, but here's one of mine:

In 2008 (I think), I joined some friends who I knew from a Bandit/Katana forum to watch the AMA Superbike races at Mid-Ohio and then do Keith Code's California Superbike class on the same track on Monday. I rode my SV650 about 400 miles to the track starting early on Sat morning. Some of us were camping at the track, others had a hotel. I was part of the cheaptastic camping crew, so it was a tough time when it rained almost all of Saturday and we learned how the track got its nickname of "Mud Ohio". There were a few furtive stops and starts of practice on Sat, but most of my memories are of being cold and wet, drinking beers watching the track dryer trying to make the surface raceable.

The time at the track that night was a bit more "Lord of the Flies" than I would like - lots of drunks rev-bombing and shining floodlights on women and chanting "TITS! TITS! TITS!". In the middle of all of this, I got a call from my then-girlfriend, now-wife saying that Mucha, the younger of her 2 cats was acting really sick. I counselled her to make an appointment for first thing in the morning and tried to find a way to get into my tent and sleeping bag without dragging in a bunch of water and mud, and somehow caught a few winks amidst the chaos and the worry.

On Sunday, there were lots of delays related to the weather - some classes ran, and some didn't. Everything was late, and there were lots of conflicting announcements. It was hard to enjoy but a few fast bikes blasting past now and then will buoy the spirits for a while. I had a couple of calls about the sick kitty - she was at the vet, they found a blockage due to something she had eaten. She was a feral kitten and was a bit nuts, always attacking and chewing on anything that struck her fancy. I was concerned, but trusted the vet and looked forward to track school the next day. I was also REALLY looking forward to a night in a hotel to dry out and warm up and maybe even get a bit of rest.

Sign-in for track school was at 7:00 on Mon, so I was up getting showered and packed at 5:00. Quick breakfast with my buddies at 6:00 and then we rolled to the track - a pack of semi-rowdy bikes burbling through small-town Ohio just as people were starting to get up and get their days going.

Mon was HOT. Spent the day in full leathers with the midwest sun blasting down on us, rotating through instruction, track time, and debrief sessions. I was barely able to down enough cold water and find enough shade to keep my head clear enough to continue the track sessions. The school itself was wonderful - an experience that's well worth having for anyone who likes riding a motorcycle, IMO. I really liked KC's analytical approach of testing every assumption, breaking down every long-held belief. "Raise your hand if you'd rather be smooth than fast", "Can you crash a motorcycle by turning in too fast?", "Do you need your body weight to turn a bike?" - and the ZX636 Kawis were so fun. I think it was the last year before he switched to the S1000RR bikes loaded with rider aids.

During the break before our last session, I got a text. The kitty didn't make it. Little Mucha was dead.

I was in 2 worlds at the same time: gut-punched by this update from my distraught better half, and taking part in an amazing experience surrounded by buddies having one of the best days of their lives. I called her and said that I'd make it home that night and we could grieve together and comfort each other a bit.

I got my game face on for one last session, got loaded up, and went over the plan with the crew who were riding to Erie PA. I'd go that far with them and then press on back to Toronto. It was still a strange mix of happiness and sadness - I didn't share anything about Mucha because I wanted to work through it on my own terms, and because I didn't want to bring down a group of great dudes having a fun time. We left the parking lot at about 5:00, and stopped for supper at about 7:00. Even with the sun setting, it was still brutally hot. We finally made it to the motel in Erie a bit before midnight, I said goodbye, killed an ice-cold Redbull, and got back on the SV.

I still remember how wonderful it felt when I first hit some fog in the cooler midnight air with my mesh gear on. It was an incredible relief, and I was looking forward to riding that way for an entire 2 hour stint, thinking it was just what I needed. Well friends, let me tell you - nobody needs to go from the verge of heat exhaustion to hypothermia in the course of a few hours on a motorcycle at Interstate speeds. I kept at it as long as I could, the stopped early to zip the panels back into my jacket, close up all of the vents, and pull on a 2nd pair of socks. As I rode through the night, I could feel my body shutting down from exhaustion and cold. I knew that there was a 24h rest stop on the US side of the border, and that there was a Denny's there. I kept myself going by vividly imagining the hot tea and big bowl of soup that would bring me back to life once I made it.

That Denny's at 1:30 in the morning was the saddest, and most desolate thing I have ever seen. The zombie-eyed waitress told me that they were out of soup until morning, sandwiches only for now. I love a good Philly cheesesteak, and they were still available, so I went that way. Now, to this day I STILL love a good Philly cheesesteak, but that's not what you get at the Buffalo rest stop Denny's at 1:30 AM on a Tuesday. It was without a doubt the worst sandwich I have ever tasted - just awful from start to finish. But I downed it like medicine - I needed the calories and the mass of greasy heat in my belly to get my blood flowing again.

I was back on the bike a bit after 2:00, with my only mission being to reach my girlfriend's home and make good on my promise. Border crossings are hit & miss, but this one was easy. I was in Ontario again when I felt the protestations of that goddamn sandwich in my gut. I will probably never have a more complicated relationship with a meal than that one. I wanted so badly to pull over and puke up that mass of grease and filth, but I knew that I still needed whatever I was getting from the worst cheesesteak known to man. In the same way that I had early kept myself going by vividly imagining a restoring bowl of soup, my sustaining vision now was to get home, put my arms lovingly around the bowl of my gf's toilet, and barf the contents of my stomach to hell.

I pulled into the parking lot at just a bit before 4:00. By the time I got to her place, there was nothing left of Satan's own Sammich to get rid of. It had done its duty, I had made it home. I cleaned up, hugged and kissed and cried a bit over the loss of a beloved and special cat, and also realized that this person I was with was by far the most important thing in my life. As we laid down together to get a couple of hours of sleep, we agreed that I'd move out of my place and into hers. We've shared an address and so much more ever since.

Before I closed my eyes, I looked at the clock. It was about 4:30. Before I fell asleep I thought "F*** - I can't even take credit for riding 24 hours." :lol:
Phil in Toronto
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Re: Story Book

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Wow Phil, now I feel like I need to ask the nurse for a precautionary barf bag. :( but an interesting
story just the same. That sounded like a rough weekend before finishing it off with a greasy sandwich!

IMO riding in hot weather is easier than cold weather, especially after dark.

More stories please !

Well written Phil. I got inspired to write by my English 201 class "Creative Writing" and by reading a LOT
of Mike Nixons material and studying his writing style.

The original story about riding back from Cal. saved the part about getting stopped by AZ. Hwy. patrol
and signing the ticket for the very end of the story but I chose to leave it in the sequential order of events
this time. I wish I had saved that ticket and framed it. Maybe my grandson will find it tucked in one of my
shop manuals somewhere, someday.
Bob
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Re: Story Book

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My 18 yr. old Grandson is interested in learning to work on motorcycles. I figure the CBX
might be a good starting point!? 8) After all they were school bikes :D

I'm going to need his help to finish the project bike.
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Re: Story Book

Post by Rick Pope »

What a great way to get some quality time with your grandson!!!
Rick Pope
Either garage is too small or we have too many bikes. Or Momma's car needs to go outside.

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Re: Story Book

Post by Larry Zimmer »

LUV the 'management' photo Bob!! :D Great program.
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Re: Story Book

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He's going to have to learn to ride first. Good starting point, don't you think !?
Then he needs to find something ride and learn to maintain while getting familiar with the CBX.
I've got the R&D platform motor for basic mechanical training as well as the ICOA . If I can keep
him focused I believe he'll be a good/great mechanic.
I had 73 KD125 Kaw. that's been sitting for more than 15 yrs. parked on the deck behind the house.
I told him that if he wanted to dig it out and clean it up and sell it, he could keep whatever he
could get for it and (hopefully) put it toward a good street bike. He dove in head first and now
needs to learn all the markets and values. I know he's got his eyes on one of my CBXs. :shock:
Bob
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Re: Story Book

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Success ! He sold the KD125, no title (bought by a friend many yrs. ago at auction), not running
but would turn over, all original but needed a LOT of work. He got $500 for it. I might put some
$ in and help him get a good street legal ride. 8)
Bob
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Re: Story Book

Post by Larry Zimmer »

For another $500, or so, there are plenty good rides out there. Might just need a little tlc such as a brake review and oil change to go back onto the road. Maybe tires. Have fun. Good start for the youngun'.
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Re: Story Book

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Larry Zimmer wrote:
Wed Feb 28, 2024 11:58 am
For another $500, or so, there are plenty good rides out there. Might just need a little tlc such as a brake review and oil change to go back onto the road. Maybe tires. Have fun. Good start for the youngun'.

Yes, I encouraged him to hang on to that money and I would work with him to find a good 4 stroke ride.
I've got 4 complete bikes but all are far beyond what he has any business riding, much less learning on.
I've got several projects but they fall in the same category.
I've got to hurry up and get home soon before he gets wrenchhappy ! :( :o :shock:
Bob
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